There was a time when some quite distinguished men held mayoral office around the country, until appointments were increasingly decided by national party leaders. While it may be refreshing to see a woman appointed nowadays, it would be even more refreshing to see councillors themselves decide who should hold the chain of office. Mind you, that might lead to more independentminded individuals – and some wouldn’t want that. They should heed Pythia, with whom I was chatting recently: “Sticking fingers in the wrong place leads to the Burns Unit – or the Cardiac Centre, with lots of whaling (courtesy of the Japanese) and gnashing of teeth.”

What a start you’ll have with all the by-election rubbish! What a pity politicos don’t study us daemones more closely; we defined the good qualities worth following – and the bad ones to be avoided at all costs. My sister Hybris was the goddess of reckless pride, arrogance and outrageous behaviour. As Hesiod wrote, “Listen to right and do not foster Hybris. Even the prosperous (in Sodnac) cannot easily bear its burden, but are weighed down under it when their delusions are shattered. The better path is to follow Justice; for Dike beats Hybris when she comes at length to the end of the race (electoral or otherwise). But only when he has suffered does the fool learn this.”

Lemon Man’s managed to antagonise almost every party as none of them is sure who’ll win. And how can he imagine he’ll get elected without support from a more-established party? Perhaps when you’re a macro, Macron’s victory in France makes illusions of grandeur even stronger. In fact, the Olympos Chronicle has started speculating that this by-election is all a devious plot by the Son King and his father’s one-time sweetheart to split and destabilise the opposition – and is trying to work out how much the Stree Consulting’s local agent may benefit from the operation. Still, at least pasta-sellers may enjoy a boom time, not to mention stationers selling envelopes, right for stuffing. Even microwaves may enjoy fresh popularity as the energy-inefficient models need to be off-loaded.

Politicos seem to believe that Lethe (Forgetfulness) rules amongst the Admirables but how can they forget that almost all politicos supported the Metro Express, léger or otherwise, when in office and then expect to be believed when they criticise it a short time later? Anyway, what does he want? To see the new rail system miss out your town altogether? If he wanted to find an excuse to resign, he could have found a more convincing one.

Meanwhile, the only things sure to result from political interference are incompetence, inefficiency and overstaffing. But what can you do to prove your worth, without being arrested by an overzealous policeman bent on increasing his tally? You could start by insisting that all complaints and correspondence received by the municipality are answered quickly, with proper follow-up. It costs nothing, apart from a sweaty brow or two, and could become a model for the whole of the public sector. But I may have been influenced by other relatives of mine, the Oneiroi, dark-winged spirits of dreams who each night emerge like a flock of bats from their caves in Erebos, the land of eternal darkness. Let’s dream: May you and all your fellow mayors confound the Skeptics and prove to be brilliant choices! If that’s too optimistic, perhaps we should let the Oneiroi go suck a lemon…

Yours sincerely,

Epi PHRON