Of all Ancient Greek concepts, the idea politicos most love is that, like the gods, they can do whatever they like while the rest of the populace simply grin and bear it. Some grin of course because they’ve also found a way of boarding the gravy train; most find it unbearable. The promise of an open declaration of politicos’ assets seems forgotten, as it might equally embarrass both sides of the Chamber.

Rather than counting the family gains or pretending to be antediluvian, you could push for a new law behind the scenes – and even women’s rights in your spare time. Not that it’s just MPs and their families whose wealth needs publishing. Civil and public servants (a misnomer if ever there was one) also need controlling, as well as the host of advisers. And for your former ministry, a transparent system is urgently needed for the allocation of state land – while there’s still some left – plus an enquiry into how state land can be acquired and sold on at a vast profit. Or have just too many nobs benefitted over the years?

Classical Athens found nothing more despicable than using public office for private gain but today’s Admirables are convinced that many leading figures are as corrupt as Harpalus. However unfair, it’s a damning perception, especially with the maladroit approach of the police and the ICAC to cases involving politicos. Some seem to imagine the status quo can continue ad nauseam; others defend the need to oil the machinery of government – but if the system worked openly and honestly, it wouldn’t need such frequent servicing. At least the MRA has a scheme to discourage unexplained staff wealth, although Pote Paul has bizarrely criticised it for pursuing tax evaders. Mind you, they do form a significant vote bank.

Incidentally, while it’s inconceivable that someone for whom religion is so important could behave like Pinocchio, or Baby Doc and his cronies, as you knew nothing about the way your son acquired state land, it does suggest a seriously dysfunctional ministry, not to mention family life. As for the recent dinner party, whilst we were so looking forward to thousands of Arab princes flying in to holiday aboard their magnificent yachts berthed in the new marina north of Port-Louis, what’s happened instead? An all-male banquet that’s created more of a stir than #Meetoo. It’s provided food for thought but was no great deal – or a host of women’s associations, not to mention ailes féminines, should logically be banned. The error was in not fully following tradition by sitting in a circle on the sand (as in the desert) and eating sheep’s eyes with your hands. Better to do things properly or not at all.

Many of your co-religionists feel rather embarrassed. After all, religious affiliation isn’t designed to be used for political purposes. That you still have any followers suggests tribal bonding rather than anything else. Bondié, with whom your communications seem as flawed as with your own officials, is fed up with mortals who blame him – or her – for their own errors. A religion without universal values is as pointless as political parties without principles, just a motley crew of leaders. Given that the other party leaders are all to some degree discredited or so lacking in charisma that a wet blanket might have more success, your own crew has a fair chance of being re-elected – but only if projects are introduced to improve good governance and dinosaurs discarded. Given your interest in land, you could lead the way by buying a house in Mare-Chicose…