It’s a fantasy that has been killed many times, but it never stays dead for long. That the economic boom which this country achieved in the 80s was a miracle. The work of one single man during a specific period of time. In this miracle, there is no room for other politicians and entrepreneurs who had vision, paved the way or actively participated in the making of a prosperous nation. And the myth just took on a life of its own.

This week, Pravind Jugnauth, expressed his intention to achieve another miracle as “we – whoever that ‘we’ refers to – have already achieved a first one”.

Why, Prime Minister, what we have achieved under your leadership is not just one but many economic miracles. Your reign started with the biggest economic miracle of all: BAI, which was declared a Ponzi scheme and whose closure was not going to cost the taxpayer “a single penny”. That was your first miracle as a result of which several billions of taxpayers’ money were necessary to pay for everything that has been going wrong since. But that was not the only miracle. This was immediately followed by the Betamax miracle that was going to save us huge amounts of money. After a sonorous slap by the Privy Council, another Rs6 billions of public funds went to pay for a revenge trip gone haywire. And we don’t dare ask how much we are paying for our freight today!

But one of the biggest miracles has to be the Contribution Sociale Généralisée. It is absolutely ingenious: private sector employees get fleeced by this punitive, disguised additional tax and civil servants benefit from it without ‘contributing’ a single cent! It is a win-win miracle even if not for everyone.

One should not forget the most spectacular miracle of all: the Bank of Mauritius granting Rs60 billions to the government without this appearing as a debt of the latter and with the Bank vaults filling up so quickly with the fiat money of its printing press, thanks to the  engineered devaluation of the rupee and without much increase in inflation! If this is not the mother of miracles, I’d like to know what is.

In between, there have been smaller miracles like inaugurating roads and bus stops twice, meaning that they vanish after the first inauguration and miraculously reappear for a second one. Or like the Mauritius Broadcasting Corporation that takes disasters and immediately transforms them into great opportunities, with grief replaced by smiling faces, deaths giving way to happiness and misery turning into ecstasy and praise for “our young and dynamic leader”. Anyone who doesn’t believe in magic just has to look at this abracadabra and immediately become a convert.

One should not forget the miracle of people who start their business in scrap metal and end up as medical oxygen suppliers to our hospitals; airhostesses becoming expert professional cleaners thanks to their ‘proximity’ with those in power; or those who were in the security business or specialising in birthday parties of politicians who morph into pharmaceutical purveyors, raking in millions of rupees overnight. These people have miraculous powers that allow them to guess what the government’s exact needs are in every ministry and immediately start a business to supply it at the price they want. Where else have such miracles been seen?

If you want more miracles, think of the Côte d’Or Stadium whose cost jumped from Rs1.2 billion to Rs5.4 billion; Safe City that we will fork out the unbelievable amount of Rs19 billions for and which goes blind whenever convenient. And don’t forget the miracle of the national airline which went belly up even before Covid hit!

So take heart, Prime Minister, there have been innumerable miracles during your prime ministership. Small and big, you have personally fathered them all. As you are acquiring more and more power, we will presumably witness even more in the years to come! So please don’t be modest by talking about a second miracle. It doesn’t begin to do justice to the countless feats you have already accomplished.