No, Your Honour, I did NOT lie to Christine Daguy, the biggest charlatan and swindler I have had the pleasure of sitting in the same room with. Now, if your question is ‘did I do her job for her’, the answer is no, I didn’t.

In my defence, Your Honour, I expect an internationally-acclaimed medium and soothsayer who claims to speak to the dead to at least be able to make the difference between the dead and the living. She did not display that ability to me. Far from it. 

To the uninitiated, Christine Daguy is a household name. She is a French woman who spends three months every year in Mauritius swindling and fleecing our gullible compatriots and impoverishing our people. She is the most famous international medium and fortune teller in the country. You hear her on the radio at least twice a week giving advice to our compatriots, many of whom are very young, and inviting them to come for more at her consultation. What happens there is the stuff nightmares are made of. 

I have nothing against Daguy personally. Any more than I have against all the charlatans and swindlers walking the face of this earth, that is. It is a world I despise with all my might, without any distinction. The reason I targeted her instead of the corner fortune tellers that she herself scoffs at as ‘charlatans’ is because she is considered the epitome of success in this field. She has to be one of the most highly mediatised charlatans in the world. She jets around the world to “help others” so her influence is more noxious. 

For that reason, I carried out an extensive background check on her for three full months. Everything she said anywhere in the world on any platform. Everything said about her anywhere in the world. And, naturally, anything she said about herself. There was no dearth of information to keep one busy. Once I knew the person I was dealing with, and with fear in my heart, I made the move I had been planning for weeks.  

With a hidden mic and a photo of my husband, I took an appointment and paid the ‘small token’ of Rs5,500 to benefit from the boundless wisdom she dishes out and the great ‘gifts’ she repeats she possesses. I gave her all the information she wanted. She spent no more than 20 minutes ‘working’ for that money and sent me back home with the following verdict: ‘Your life is so sad that you are not living but existing; I see nothing that will ever change that or cheer you up.’ She ‘talked’ to my husband ‘in heaven’ and he supposedly told her that he was very happy where he was. My husband later confirmed to me that he had no recollection of having spoken to her or that he was in a different world. He did confirm however that he was happy where he was: on the beach, on a public holiday! 

The full story is in Weekly this week. It is funny but bone-chilling at the same time. You will find out how she could destroy lives of less cynical and more trusting people, just for money. A lot of money. For she did give the only solution to all my problems: getting rid of the evil spell. She’s the only one who can do that. She will work for seven months, using only a swatch of my hair and my date of birth. And she will help me be happy. This great act of selfless help will cost me only Rs60,000! 

How she’s been getting away with so much bullshit every year, how she manages to get so many clients that it takes at least a week to get an appointment with her and, above all, how she manages to extort so much money tax free is something that I still shudder thinking about. 

I hope that by exposing the queen bee, Weekly will help make a little dent in the sick and sickening beehive of lies, deceit, false promises and swindling that constitutes a true industry anchored, of course, on the customers’ credulity! One can only hope. One cannot foresee. 

For more views and in-depth analysis of current issues, Weekly magazine (Price: Rs 25) or subscribe to Weekly for Rs110 a month. (Free delivery to your doorstep). Email us on: weekly@lexpress.mu